Bloggymoms Writers Workshop Prompt July 11, 2011

(I decided to tie this week’s prompt in with a prompt from  June 20th. Here is the link for that story if you haven’t read it. http://chelle65584.blogspot.com/2011/06/bloggy-moms-writers-workshop-prompt-for.html )

Marlom shifted impatiently as he waited for his host to return from the kitchen with their beverages. The man hadn’t sounded old over the telephone but in person, he was greeted by an elderly man, stooped over, thinning white hair, and only half his dentures in place. An annoying cat kept rubbing against his black pant leg, leaving behind white fur. Trying to swat the cat away, Marlom almost knocked over the lamp to his side. He caught it just in time as his host shuffled back into the living room.

“I see Snowball has been keeping you company,” he spoke in his raspy voice.

Marlom nodded politely as his host set down the tray. He watched as the old man’s hands shook pouring the tea into the cups. Marlom kept a polite smile on his face as the old man handed him his cup, spilling the hot liquid onto his hands. The old man settled into his recliner, cup in hand. He seemed oblivious to Snowball, who was now in the old man’s lap, drinking out of his cup.

“How exactly did you come into possession of the key?” Marlom asked, ready to get down to business.

“Well, it was the strangest thing, actually. Quite unexpected. I was here, at my apartment, watching television when the phone rang. Naturally, I answered it. You see, I seldom receive calls. It was quite exciting, wasn’t it Snowball?” The old man seemed to forget his guest as he pet his cat, fur floating in the dusty apartment.

Marlom coughed and took a small sip of tea. He almost choked as he caught the after taste of a cheap liquor. Smiling, he set the cup on the table next to him. As if they were conspirators, the old man raised his cup to Marlom before taking a deep drink.

“As I was saying, I answered. There was a woman on the other end. I believe she said her name is Alice. She seemed quite distraught, the poor dear. The connection was horrid. I could only make out every few words. We were disconnected quite a few times but she always managed to call back.”

“Did this Alice say anything else besides something about the key?”

“Yes, yes she did. I think she said something about being locked in a room without a door.”

Marlom stroked his chin as he digested the last sentence. How had this Alice ended up with the key? It didn’t make sense to him and he wasn’t sure what it all meant yet. And if she was locked in a room without a door, how did she get in there? Would there really be a phone in this room?

“And you’re sure you don’t know who she is?”

“Quite sure, quite sure. I’d never spoken to her before. It’s quite mysterious, if you ask me. I mean, it was a wrong number that started it. At first she was asking for someone else. I think the name was Samuel, if I’m not mistaken. Naturally, I told her she had the wrong number. I hung up and she called back almost immediately.”

The old man tipped his cup to his mouth. He slurped up the remaining tea with delight and a touch of greed. He pushed Snowball from his lap and leaned over to pour more tea.

Marlom sat back. He was even more confused than he was before setting foot in the old man’s apartment.

“Thank you for your time,” Marlom said, standing up to leave. “If you hear from this Alice again, please call me as soon as possible.”

The old man nodded as Marlom closed the door behind him.


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5 Responses

  1. Ohhhhhhhhhhh!! I love the mystery and LOVE that you are adding on to that story!! I can't wait to find out what happens next. Mysterious Alice and the room without a door…You changed Marlom's name once here: As if they were conspirators, the old man raised his cup to Malcom before taking a deep drink. Just thought you might want to fix it. (I hate having typos in my stories!! LOL)This >> "He slurped up the remaining tea with delight and a touch of greed." Ohhh this blew me away!! how vivid. This whole story, I can see the old man's house, the tea, the smiles.Great job!!

  2. I thought I had caught all the name changes. LOL. Thanks for pointing that out to me. Thanks for the encouragement and support!

  3. Chelle, your writing is getting so exciting and so captivating. I so wanted to continue reading and finding out what was going to happen next. I loved it! As always, I really appreciate your comment and thanks for taking the time to comment on my post. Have a great rest of the week, BarbaraEspañol para Niños (Spanish for Kids)

  4. Thank you! I'm really enjoying writing and reading the stories from everyone. It gives me the encouragement to keep going with something I have loved to do for a long time now!

  5. Curiouser and curiouser 🙂 I can't help but think of Alice through the looking glass :)A very interesting mystery you are building. I look forward to reading more.

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